My final message to a good friend…R.I.P Shannon Heathcote

I lost a friend this week. The kind of friend that you can go years without seeing but when you do it is like no time has passed at all. We had lost touch with each other over the past couple of years both of us wrapped up in our own lives and families. I had moved away and did not get back to the old stomping grounds as much as I would have liked any more. She had gotten married had children, gotten divorced and had a breakdown. I had gotten married started a company and gotten wrapped up in my animal advocacy work.

The last time we spoke we both lamented the fact that we were so far apart and that it made keeping up our friendship so difficult. We had told each other we had to get together soon, but we never found the time. Good intentions always, but life got in the way. We told ourselves there was all the time in the world and that soon we would rekindle the close friendship we once shared. Then came the news that she was gone suddenly and unexpectedly. Then came the regrets. Why didn’t I take the time to call, to visit? Why didn’t I make more of an effort?

She is gone now, and I will never be able to tell her how much I thought of her over the last two years, how many times I picked up the phone to call but something made me hesitate. Did she feel that I had abandoned her? I should have made more effort to keep in touch. We were very close once, she was like the sister I never had. We were always there for each other and no matter how we felt we always backed each other up. Then life happened and we went our separate ways telling ourselves we had lots of time, there would always be tomorrow. But there are no more tomorrows, and now I can never say all the things that I should have said when I had the time.

Shannon I’m sorry. Sorry I did not make an effort to keep our friendship going, sorry that I let my life take precedence over our friendship, sorry that I was not there for you when I should have been. If we are right and after death we are taken home to be with God, I hope that you can hear me. I pray that you know that I never stopped caring, never stopped counting you among my best friends. I hope that you understand that I loved you with the type of love that we reserve for special friends the kind of friends that we wish were family. A long time ago I walked away from my true family, I did not like the kind of people they were. You were one of the friends that made up my new family, the family I chose because they truly cared about me, and because I truly cared about them.

Although I hadn’t seen you since my wedding reception in 2008, I thought about you often. I wish that I could turn back time, that you were still with us, but most of all I wish that I were not saying goodbye, because I am not ready to let you go. This isn’t fair, you had too much life ahead of you! You were far too young.

Goodbye Shannon, I will miss you. I will always remember our friendship and the things we helped each other through. When we all lived in Shelburne there was never a time when I needed you that you were not there for me. You were a true friend, and I will never forget you.

Shannon Heathcote November 6 1975- September 13, 2012

…when you work for something you get rewarded for your efforts.

So, summer is over and the kids are back at school. Whew! What a relief that is! Don’t get me wrong, I like kids, I just don’t like them in my yard screaming their heads off making my dogs go insane. Best place for them is in school and very far away from me! I have raised my kids and now I prefer the kind of children that you can give back when you are done with them! You know, OTHER PEOPLE”S CHILDREN! The kind I can fill up with sugar and send home to their parents knowing they (the parents) will be secretly cursing me when junior fails to go to bed on time because he’s on a sugar high, and can’t sit still.

Kids these days are the bane of my existence, but maybe that’s because parents these days are idiots. Now again don’t get me wrong, there are some amazing parents out there still, it’s just not the norm. These days most parents seem to go through life oblivious to the fact that it is their job as parents to raise responsible, moral, law abiding citizens who will grow up to be an asset to society not a burden on the welfare system. Problem is kids these days seem to grow up with a sense of entitlement as if the world owes them something. Quite frankly I just don’t get it. How does this happen? How do we take children and turn them into adolescents that expect us to hand them the world on a silver platter?

There are a lot of things we could blame this on. Society’s desire to shelter them from hardship is one thing. I have read several reports recently about teachers suspended or fired from their jobs for handing out zero marks for work not handed in. WTF??? Now we can not grade accordingly? I don’t get it. I mean how do you teach a work ethic when not allowed to give marks that reflect the work handed in or in this case, not handed in? When there are no consequences for homework not done, how can you expect kids to learn you get what you work towards?

No wonder so many of our teenage children sit around at home waiting for handouts from Mommy and Daddy, no one has taught them that when you work for something you get rewarded for your efforts. They have been taught that it is someone else’s responsibility to provide for them, someone else will give them everything they demand. Someone else will pay that bill, fill the fridge with their favorite foods, and tolerate their bad behavior on a daily basis.

We put a label on them all! This one has ADD, that one ADHD, it’s the disease causing them to act out it isn’t their fault! This one doesn’t take criticism well so we can’t give him a zero on the uncompleted homework from yesterday because it will hurt his self esteem! Hmmm, how the hell did my generation get through life? Back when I was coming up bad behavior was bad behavior, there was no such thing as ADD or ADHD. If you didn’t pay attention in class, notes went home to parents, and you were punished for acting out until you learned to behave. These days when junior comes home with a note that says he’s been acting out in class Mommy sends a letter back telling the teacher “oh it’s just his ADD there is nothing we can do about it. You will just have to find a way to deal with him.”

What I would like to know is exactly when did society decide that bad grades were not to be given? I mean, how the hell are we supposed to teach kids anything if we are not allowed to tell them they are not grasping the concept? If evaluating their true progress is to be prevented to preserve their “self esteem” how are teachers supposed to paint a true picture of junior’s ability to learn? If kids aren’t getting marked on the quality of the work they are producing aren’t we pretty much allowing them to be pushed through the school system without really knowing whether or not they have learned anything?

Just my opinion.

Janette

Ramblings

PC Warning! Some of these are slightly politically incorrect. If you’re easily offended, stop reading now.

  • Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.
  • One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
  • Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
  • If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
  • The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
  • I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, “Where’s the self-help section?” She said if she told me it would defeat the purpose.
  • What if there were no hypothetical questions?
  • If a deaf person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
  • If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
  • Is there another word for synonym?
  • Where do forest rangers go to “get away from it all”?
  • What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
  • If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
  • Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
  • Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them?
  • If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
  • Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
  • If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to start speaking?
  • Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines?
  • How do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road signs?
  • What was the best thing before sliced bread?
  • One nice thing about egotists: they don’t talk about other people.
  • Does the Little Mermaid wear an algebra?
  • Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
  • How is it possible to have a civil war?
  • If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown, too?
  • If you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
  • If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
  • Whose cruel idea was it for the word “Lisp” to have “S” in it?
  • Why are hemorrhoids called “hemorrhoids” instead of “assteroids”?
  • Why is it called tourist season if we can’t shoot at them?
  • Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
  • If you spin an oriental man in a circle three times does he become disoriented?